Why Louis J. Wood is so Fucked up -by Louis j wood
Hey Everyone, I just want a few minutes of your time to clear something up. You might wonder sometimes, What in the hell is wrong with Lou, Why's he so F.U.C.T. WELL I"LL TELL YOU WHY. There have been many events in my life that any normal person could'nt handle. Some are recent, some are from childhood. Here are the ten most traumatic events of my life.
10) New Years Eve 97/98, need I say more.
9) When that little Bitch Kristy stole my Garbage Pail Kids and denied it after I found them, IN HER ROOM. I then tore out her earring and pushed her down a hill.
8) I was on my bike going to see my girlfriend for the last time before she went away. My cousin(Joe) ran me off the road at a high speed, knocking me out cold. I never saw her again.
7) When I was 11 I walked in on my parents having sex, OH MY GOD!
6) One time me and my Girlfriend walked in on her RETARDED sister who had put peanut butter on her twat and was letting their German Shepard eat her out. We'll laughing like a madwoman.
5) The time me and my brother were playing with our Star Wars figures and Princess Layas head popped off, AAAHHHHGODDAMIT!
4) The time I fell in the Swamp by K-Mart in the middle of winter. My brother, My Loving Cousin, and everyone in Blockbuster Video was laughing at me calling me SWAMPTHING. Despite my physical and emotional pain, AND ITS STILL NOT FUCKIN FUNNY GUYS.
3) IN 1st Grade Lunch Period I went to put my straw in my Capri Sun juice and It went right through the other side. I FUCKIN HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS!
2) The second grade field trip to Wigston Honey Farms. They had this great stuff called Whipped Honey for only 2 dollars a jar, and my CHEAP-ASS MOTHER only gave my $1.50. The whole way home all the other children enjoyed there whipped honey, and I only had some stupid bear shaped economy plastic thing. AAAAAHHHHFUCK.
1) It was hard to choose #1, but after careful thinking I know what It was.
The #1 traumatic event in my life must have been moving in with you, YOU FUCKIN SLIME.
Well I think that says it all. Thank you and Peace Out
Hey, WHO ORDERED THE FISH!